When we are faced with a problem, task or unexpected situation, more often than not, the first thing that goes through our mind is 'how am I going to deal with this, handle this or get through this?' While this may be the most logical, or familiar, phrase to most of us, it is not the most powerful way to approach it. In fact, the exact opposite is true.
The word 'how' is an abstraction that puts us in our head and sends us down a tunnel of worry, stress and upset. 'How' leaves us feeling powerless and hopeless as we struggle to deal with the situation before us. In other words, we can't wrap our minds around it so we are left in a spiral of fear, anxiety and overwhelm.
Rather than asking 'how' instead try asking yourself 'what'. What can I do? What actions can I take? What conversations can I have?, etc. The word 'what' takes it out of an abstraction and puts us in a state of action which moves us forward in managing the situation. As we take those actions, we see new...
If there is one thing I tell my clients to do on a regular basis it’s ‘Breathe’.
While it may sound silly, it is a fact that many of us forget to take deep, slow breaths during the normal course of our day. We get so stressed at work, at home, on social media, and now with a global pandemic, that we don’t stop and just breathe. We spend the day worried which is exacerbated by only taking short, shallow breaths.
The simple act of breathing deeply and slowly not only reduces stress and lowers our heart rate, it allows us to get grounded, present, and recharge. Placing your hands over your heart while breathing amplifies these benefits by connecting you to your heart as well. And when we are coming from our heart, the life we experience is always richer.
It is important that we take care of ourselves first. You simply can’t pour from an empty glass. And, when we are dealing with exceptional times like these, it is all the more important to...
Most of us get the concept - ‘You Get What You Focus On’. It seems pretty straight forward. Focus on what you want and it manifest in your life, right?
Then why do so many things that we don't want keep showing up? That’s a great question, so let’s take a look.
First, I want you to read this one more time:
‘You Get What You Focus On’
That means you get exactly what you focus on - whether it's positive or negative. If you are focussing on it, more of it will manifest. In other words anything you focus on is what you will have more of, including:
If you are someone who has been focussing on paying down debt, for example, what you will end up with is more debt, simply because debt is what you have been focussing on. The same is true for anything else. If you are focussing on having less stress, stress is what manifests because that is what you...
Imagine a 60 year old stomping their foot on the ground, crossing their arms and shouting ‘But I want to!’ Most of us are able to see that this type of behavior is something we upgrade as we get more mature. We know that what worked when we were 3 probably doesn’t work today.
But what about our money conversations? If truth be told, most of us are having the same conversations about money that we were having when we were very young. And while they may have served us back then to get a larger allowance or money for candy, as adults, with adults obligations, these old conversations don’t serve us well at all.
Yet most of us have never upgraded how we think, relate and talk about money. We are regurgitating the same old conversations about money that we heard when we were children. What are those conversations for you?
‘I could never afford that’
‘I can’t have money and be a good person’
‘Money is the root of all...
I often draw the correlation between how we relate to money and how we relate to someone we love. Because when we treat the ones we love with honor, respect and appreciation, the depth of our relationship is strengthened and their desire to be with us is enhanced. Both are elevated resulting in a more powerful and fulfilling relationship.
The same is true for money.
Most people only think about and want the big numbers when it comes to money. Pennies, nickels and dimes are not important and are often left untouched when encountered. But that would be like only wanting the big picture with your partner and ignoring their eyes, lips, hands, etc. because you aren’t interested in them or find them unappealing. If you cannot love the individual parts, how can you say you love the whole which is made up of those parts? Imagine how your partner would respond it you were to pull away when they try to caress your face because you don’t like their hands? This aversion would begin...
Is it possible to have Abundance & Prosperity and still be happy?
In the course of striving to have an abundant life full of prosperity, we oftentimes have uncomfortable conversations about money. We try to avoid them if we can, but in the end, we must force ourselves to suffer through those sometimes painful, yet important conversations.
One thing I have noticed in over 25 years as a coach is that more times than not, the conversations are having us rather than us having them. Much like a rollercoaster, the bar goes down, and while it may cause a multitude of emotions, the ride is always the same from start to finish. There is no way to deviate from the set path, nor alter its final destination. The same is true for these money conversations that we have with ourselves and others. The conversation starts and there may be fear, or other emotions, but the path of the conversation and its final conclusion are set.
This is what I mean when I say ‘The conversation is having us'. The words might be different, even the emotions may vary, but...
Living an abundant life is something I have spent more than 20 years exploring. In 2004 I made my first trip to Paris, France and fell in love. I knew one day I would live in this magnificent city! There was something about it, the people, the culture, that gave me a sense of being home. For the next ten years, I visited twice a year, until I finally made the move. After I sold my home and packed my things, on December 31st, 2014 I boarded a plane to begin this new chapter in my life. Living in another country, with a different language and culture had its challenges, but I met them head-on. I began to forge friendships with people I now consider part of my family and learned more in the next 3 ½ years than I could ever have imagined. But one core value that will remain with me forever is the French approach to work and living an abundant life.
There is a misconception that the French are lazy and don’t like to work. It is not uncommon to see French workers...
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